Pretend ‘mass’ kits for catholic kids

3 December 2008 · 10 Comments 
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I kid you not (no pun intended). Fisher Price didn’t even get a look-in.

Cult toys for Kool Kidz

Cult toys for Kool Kidz

My Mass Kit is the flagship product in the Wee Believersâ„¢1 Catholic toy line. This innovative[!], educational[!] and entertaining[!] soft-sculpture toy is aimed at play for boys ages 3-12. Children will enjoy “playing Mass” using this kit as a part of their playtime activities at home or at school, and in environments such as a church sanctuary where busy-child activity requires solemn attendance.

…

Pieces include: Crucifix, Chalice, Thurible, Finger Bowl, Purificator, 2 Cruets, 2 Candles, Paten, cloth Corporal, and foam Hosts

“Foam”?! What the hell are kids going to do with foam crackers? Just don’t give any to PZ, ok?

What, then, are the features of this “innovative, educational and entertaining toy”? According to their web site, they are:

  • Fun way for kids to learn and appreciate the actions and beauty of the Mass [Wow!]
  • Certified Quietâ„¢ – no noisy parts to disturb reverent environments [Amazing!]
  • 12 cleanable, plush pieces [Golly!]
  • Durable canvas carrying case keeps everything organized [Zowie!]
  • Personalizable I.D. holder so each kit is your very own [Somethingtastic!]
  • Design is approved by Catholic Clergy [Christ on a bike!]
  • Ideal teaching manipulative2 for school, catechism and homeschool settings [Ker-pow!]

And all for the absolutely lowlowlow bargain price of only $89.99 (+ $6.50 P+P)!

The catholics really took that old jesuit saying to heart, didn’t they?

I wonder if they’re working on a Stre-e-e-e-etch Jesus… No, this isn’t what I meant!

/hattip: Adult Christianity

  1. seriously? [↩]
  2. shouldn’t that be “manipulation”? [↩]

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There's probably no god. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.