What “skeptics” believe

24 January 2010 · Comments Off 
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I’m not a huge follower of the CAM movement as they generally appear to be quackers enough for me to dismiss en masse, but they do have their followers and supporters, and they’ve recently be been busy on Twitter, mostly circling like decrepit vultures around the Shorty awards.

Anyway, there’s this one guy who calls himself “Health Ranger” (I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean, but I’m guessing that it’s related to some Americanism I’m ignorant of) who has popped up in quite a few Twitter conversations recently, so I thought I’d take a look at his spiel.

He doesn’t like sceptics. Oh no. Not one jot.

Well, it seems that he doesn’t: he calls them “skeptics” (the quotes appear to be part of the word itself), but he doesn’t actually seem to know any. Not a one. At least nothing like any sceptic (or skeptic) that I know.

Apparently, as a sceptic (or a “skeptic”), I believe:

  • ALL vaccines are safe and effective
  • there is NO LIMIT to the number of vaccines a person can be safely given
  • people of all ages can be safely given an unlimited number of drugs all at the same time
  • that the human body has no ability to defend itself against invading microorganism [sic]
  • that pregnancy is a disease
  • that DEAD foods have exactly the same nutritional properties as LIVING foods
  • that water has no role in human health other than basic hydration
  • that all the phytochemicals and nutrients found in ALL plants are inert, having absolutely no benefit whatsoever for human health

as well as some other crazy shit.

I have no idea what a living food is. Is that like oats that are still attached to the ground? A chicken kiev that’s still running around? A surprisingly perky salmon fillet?

Oh, yeah. In the grand tradition of those that Make Shit Upâ„¢ he completely fails to provide any actual quotes or references. Just saying…

I guess I’m not a “skeptic” then. Well, thank fuck for that: they sound as batshit insane as the Health Ranger!

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There's probably no god. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.